Felix: Birth Story

Last picture of belly taken 12/20/12;

On the night of December 26th, I was feeling tired, especially large and uncomfortable but mostly just ready to add another sweet boy to our family.  Arty and I sat in bed and played a game of Battleship and I joked that if I won he would have to go to the store for some castor oil.  Well, I won and he promptly made that trip to Kroger and brought back the oil.  I quickly swirled 4 tablespoons with orange juice and chugged it down before I had a chance to change my mind and went to bed.  I woke up at 2:30 AM and went to the bathroom.  Yes, that castor oil was doing its thing to my stomach (TMI, I know).  Then the contractions started, and once they started they were never more than three minutes apart.  I stayed on the toilet for awhile and then tried to lay down.  I laid in bed timing contractions with Arty for over an hour and they never slowed down, each lasting over 45 seconds.  I told him to try to sleep.  I grabbed the ipad, flipped the light on to our closet and sat in there trying to figure out if this was really labor or not.  At 5AM I decided to call my doctor to find out what I should do since the contractions were increasing in intensity.  She said it sounded like labor and to go in to the hospital to get checked.  I told Arty and we both got dressed.  I told my parents I was going to the hospital to get checked out.  I mentioned that I wasn't even bringing the bag I had halfway packed.

 We got checked in to the hospital around 5:30 and the nurse said I was 3cm dilated but could be stretched to a 4 (ouch) and the bag of water was bulging.  I was admitted.  The nurse told me I could walk around or take a shower if I wanted.  I walked a little, but one of the only places that felt good to me was the toilet.  I told Arty I wish I had my flip flops and he said he would go grab my bag, the camera, and my family and come back to the hospital.  We live a couple miles away so that sounded great to me.  By 7AM I was 5cm dilated and in pain.  I told the nurse I was ready to start prep for the epidural so she got the IV of fluids going.  I sat on the bed with my legs crossed, eyes closed, listening to the Bon Iver station on Pandora.  The only thing I focused on was not clenching my jaw shut.  That's all I could do.  A new nurse came in at 7:30 and sped the IV up.  At 7:40 the anesthesiologist came in and started putting the epidural in.  My doctor arrived in the room as well.  Almost as soon as the anesthesiologist told me I could lay back down, my water broke and my doctor said she was going to check me.  She said that there was no cervix left, and I asked what that meant and she said I was ready to start pushing.

I should mention that as soon as my water broke I felt a huge shift and an immediate increase of PAIN.
Arty wasn't back yet so the nurse handed me my purse so I could try to call him, but as I riffled through my purse searching for my phone he walked in the door with my mom.  Cue a huge sigh of relief.

The anesthesiologist left the room promising each contraction would get easier and things were prepared for the delivery.  Pushing started at 8 and  Felix was born at 8:08 AM weighing 8lbs 15 oz.

Saying Goodbye

I found out last night that the doctor who delivered Sullivan passed away suddenly at 39 years old.  My sweet Dr. Shannon Moorehead, I am completely stunned.  

At my eight week appointment she did all of the normal things and gave me an ultrasound herself.  At my twelve week appointment she listened to me talk about having just lost my job and our uncertainty about insurance, sensing emotion in my voice she gave me an ultrasound to "peek" at the baby.  She loved looking at the ultrasound with me and I remember just smiling so much as we watched our little peanut bouncing around.  Then again at my sixteen week appointment she asked me if we wanted to find out what we were having and we definitely did, so she gave me an ultrasound.  It was then that we found out we were having a boy.

Three of the four ultrasounds I had were given by her.   I was 28 weeks pregnant when August came around and it was time for Arty to start dental school on the other side of the country.  She knew my fears and anxiety over the possibility that he could miss the birth of our sweet boy.  I looked forward to every doctor appointment and it was agreed that at 39 weeks I would be induced so that my husband could buy a plane ticket and be with me in the delivery room to witness what was nothing short of a miracle.

 (Don't mind the position)

I think her face says EVERYTHING about who she was to me.

  I am honored that her hands were the first to touch my sweet baby's skin.  Her's were the first arms to reach for him and hold him and look in his eyes and witness his first breath of air.  My labor and delivery was truly amazing and she was a HUGE part of that experience.

 October 23, 2010

I remember that it was important for me to give her something so I got her a black stretchy elastic headband with a silver sequined bow on it because she sometimes wore cute headbands.

 

A week after delivery I had some bleeding and Dr. Moorehead checked me and gave me her cell phone number to call if I needed.  She encouraged me with breastfeeding (because I had to pump for over a week before I nursed Sully for the first time) and said that she had a rough start with one of her three babies and he ended up doing great with nursing.  She was right, Sullivan loves breastfeeding(even now but that's another story).  When I went in for my follow up appointment she was wearing the headband I got her.  It was the day before my dad, Sully, and I headed on our drive from Phoenix to West Virginia, my voice was shaky and I told her that I hoped she would deliver more of my babies.  She gave me a long, tight hug that day.  

I got to see her this past summer when she delivered my cousin's baby boy, Aden on July 18th.  She was wonderful and talked of her anniversary that had just passed.   Dr. Moorehead was the best doctor I could have ever imagined.  I won't find another like her.  My heart is aching for her husband and three little boys, who she talked so much about.

One last thing.  Sullivan has been known to call people from my phone.  On February 28th he called her cell phone.  I am not sure if he left a message or not but he loves to say "hello."  Anyway, I saw later in the day that she called back.  I wish I would have heard my phone ring so I could have talked to her.  

As always, words fall short to properly convey how she touched my life and my family's life.  She will be so deeply missed.  

~Megan

One Year

Today was emotional for me.  I didn't think that it would be, but I was wrong.  As we drove back from a quick trip to see my brother in Columbus early this morning I was watching the clock thinking back to what was going on at the same time last year.  How we were so excited to meet a baby that would change our lives, little did we know how much that change would be.  How after thirty minutes of pushing, at 5:31am on October 23rd he was placed on my stomach and in that moment my heart burst with love.  And then how only a few short minutes later he was taken to the NICU for eight long days.   As a parent I think that one of the worst things to see is your child hooked up to machines in the hospital.  I can still visualize what that looked like and it physically hurts me to think about.  The first night he spent out of the hospital was Halloween.  I never once thought about what "baby's first Halloween" costume I should get for him because I was just so thankful that he was healthy and home.  

This year has gone by faster than any other, and yet so much has changed.  I can honestly say that I have embraced motherhood and lived in the moment.  There were times that I didn't change out of my pajamas and didn't do a single thing around the house because I was taking care of my little bundle.  I do not regret those days at all.  There were countless early mornings and late nights, but we made it through.  This is the most important job I will ever have, and its the only job that I have truly loved.  I have been blessed beyond my wildest imagination.  

Thank you Sullivan for being you, and for being the sweetest and most perfect addition to our family.  I will love you forever and ever.

xoxo,

Momma

The first nine days (Sullivan's)

I have been thinking about this post since Sullivan was born.  When I got pregnant I had visions of how I thought everything was going to go.  I had a perfect pregnancy.  All my appointments were great, even the delivery was great.  But in the moments after Sullivan was born and my family and friends entered the room to see me hold him for the very first time, he started blowing bubbles.  My husband grabbed the aspirator and tried to suction the bubbles out of his mouth but they kept coming.

One of our friends used to be a nurse in labor and delivery told the nurse that he was grunting and blowing bubbles.  She quickly took him to the nursery and my husband went with him.

I wasn't really alarmed yet because I was still kind of in the moment of having just given birth to the sweetest most beautiful baby I had ever seen.  It's hard to explain but once they moved me to our room it hit me that our baby should be with us, and he wasn't yet.  They said that he had fluid in his lungs and was having trouble getting it out, and breathing.  When I saw our baby boy next he was under a plastic hood.  I wanted to hold him so badly.  I wanted to put him on my chest and nurse him in those early hours.  I wanted to see my husband hold our son for the first time.  My expectations and hopes of how those next few days would go crumbled.  I began pumping within an hour of delivery, and I continued to pump every two to three hours all day and night. Initially the nurses and doctors thought he might be out of the hospital within two to three days.  They said I could "nest" in the hospital if needed, which meant that I could stay there until he was released but I wouldn't get meals or medicine.  However, Sullivan wasn't getting better so he was transferred to another hospital with a better equipped NICU.  I followed the transport to the hospital and was sobbing.  I remember walking up to the front desk of the labor and delivery floor and telling them that my son was just transferred there and I wanted to know if I could use their pump and find out if I could nest there so at least I would be there for him at all times.  The woman gave me a hard time and I lost it.  I was sobbing again in front of a bunch of nurses and finally a sweet nurse said she would get the lactation consultant who would bring me the pump.  They had no rooms for me to stay in because there were so many mom's giving birth.  When I went back to see Sullivan, he was surrounded by nurses and the doctor.  He was getting hooked up to all the machines and they had to put an umbilical line in.  It was physically painful to see him like that.  Since we couldn't stay there Arty and I were at the hospital every day from 7am till 9pm or later with a few breaks for meals.  I pumped and pumped for him.  When he started getting better I got to nurse him and that was an amazing instant connection.  We took him home on October 31st, nine long days after he was born.  That was one of the best days of my life!

~Megan

PS this is obviously a shorter version of what happened but if you have questions e-mail me!

Sullivan's birth story: Part One

Sullivan's birth story: Part One

It all started on October 22, 2010.  I was 39 weeks pregnant and set to be induced.  I woke up at 5am and took a bath.  Then my mom and I headed over to Einstein’s and met my aunt (aka Tamarino) for a light breakfast.  Then we went to the hospital to get things going at 7am.  I filled out paperwork and had to do a few tests and get hooked up to the monitors.  I was given my first dose of cervadil to soften my cervix around 8:30, then I had to wait in the bed for two hours and then walk around the hospital for an hour.  My mom and I walked the hallways and saw the babies in the nursery.  I was getting so excited.  So at 11:30 my mom had to go and help my brother Stephen get ready for his graduation that started at 2 but he had to be there early.  Tamarino came and sat with me at the hospital while I got the second dose of cervadil.  They had me lay down for a longer time because  my contractions were too close to each other but I finally did get to walk around the halls for only a half hour.  By this time it was past 2pm and it was clear that I was going to miss Stephen’s graduation ceremony.  The nurse checked me and I was dilated 2cm. My doctor said that I was ok to leave the hospital and eat a light meal and to come back at 5pm to start the pitocin.  Tamarino drove me to Stephen’s graduation and we got to see him in his gown and take pictures as the reception was going on.  Then I went with my parents, Tamarino and my Uncle S to Paradise Bakery, at this point it was 3:30.  Afterwards, we went to the house quickly because my mom wanted to pick something up and to take one car to the hospital.  We went back to the hospital and just walked outside until it was 5pm.  I got changed and hooked up to the monitors and my contractions were still going pretty regularly but I was still only 2cm dilated.  The nurse started the pitocin and my doctor called and said she was on her way to break my water.  At 6:45 my water was broken.  Arty (husband) was set to get to Phoenix at 7pm so Uncle S and my dad went to pick him up.  Arty was in West Virginia for dental school already while I stayed in Phoenix with my family and I continued going to appointments with my OB.  Anyway, he got to the hospital around 8.  My contractions were not that painful for a few hours.  My mom, Tamarino, Uncle S, a few family friends, and Arty were in the room with me and at about 10:30 I had a breakdown.  The contractions were really painful and the room was noisy with talking and I just needed a break.  Everyone left the room and I asked the nurse to check me, I couldn’t believe I was only 3cm.  I was tired and just couldn’t relax and the nurse said that the anesthesiologist would take a half hour to get there and then it would be another 30 minutes to have relief.  Arty and I both thought that it was a good idea to make the call for the epidural.  I think it was at 11:30 that the doctor arrived and the whole process to getting the epidural only took about 15 to 20 minutes.  Then around 12 we both fell asleep.  The nurse had me lay on my left side and then a couple hours later she had me lay on my right side.  I remember waking up thinking I had some gas and also thinking my stomach was itchy.  Then the nurse walked in at 3 am and said that my doctor was on the phone and wanted to know my progress.  She checked me and I was at nine centimeters!  I remember being so excited and also nervous about the pushing since I didn't take any classes.  The nurse told me she was going to let me labor down some.  The sensation I was feeling could only be described as a "gas like" feeling.  The pressure started building and I knew that my body was ready to start pushing.  My mom went and got the nurse.  It was 4:30 am, the nurse walked in and got some things set up.  She told me we were going to start pushing to a certain point and that my doctor was on her way.  

Part two coming soon...

~Megan